I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Randomize
