Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
The chlamydia really affected his face.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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