found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
we're so committed to being not committed
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