My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
