I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Barsexuality is the new black.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
