Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
