Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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