The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
