It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
