Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
