your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize