Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
