This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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