Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
