I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Randomize