They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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