So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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