Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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