im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
