Quick, to the slutcave!
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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