I'm really into asian looking animals
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Holy sore nipples Batman
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
