Can Purell be used as lube?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize
