dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
