White coat. Heels.
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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