just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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