drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
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