so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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