Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
