hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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