I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
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