Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize