I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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