Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
