We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
