i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
