covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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