Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
