so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
FUCK WHALES
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
