Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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