I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
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