Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
i out mim tonsoeep
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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