That's intense
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
