Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
