I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i love accidental penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize