ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
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