hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize