I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I need to sanitize my soul.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
