why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
It was confusing and full of hummus
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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