It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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