you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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