called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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